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Before the big move, your exposure to the Great Outdoors was a family camping trip. And, you spent most of the time sat in your beautiful tent clinging on to your data. Now, you’re a legit farm owner and it’s the best move you ever made, figuratively and literally. Still, it’s not all picnics and rainbows. After all, it wouldn’t be life if it was easy. You may feel it’s remiss to put down your new lifestyle, especially when you have invested so much, but this post isn’t as subtle.
Let the following say the things you know to be true but don’t want to admit just yet.
Livestock Are Disgusting
Everyone thinks owning livestock is like having a cat or a dog as a pet. In reality, it’s like looking after a baby. They are constantly hungry, have zero table manners, and defecate in public. You can stare straight at them and they’ll still poop on the floor. Where’s the decorum?! Sure, the babies are cute and cuddly and they’ll melt your heart. Still, they grow up to be pretty gross and you have to clean up the mess. Oh, and don’t forget that they can be jerks. Ask any farmer who’s taken a headbutt to the nether regions.
A Couple Of Acres Aren’t Enough
At the start, it’s as if you own a manner house in the middle of the countryside. It will do for the rest of your days when you can pass it on to the kids and grandkids. A hectare of land is a legacy that will outlive everyone. Then, a realization dawns: there isn’t enough space. Well, it must be time to browse homes and see what is on the market. Owning a farm is addictive, so after a while, you want to go bigger and better. When the bug bites, there is no option other than to expand.
Pollution Is Inevitable
Part of you bought the farm to save the planet. Okay, you’re no eco-warrior but the carbon footprint was getting a bit much. Flights to exotic destinations; a car in a city full of traffic, paying ten cents for multiple plastic bags – it’s over-the-top. So, you set up shop in the countryside in the hopes to ease your guilt. Then, the pollution never stopped. Yes, your CO2 output is lower than ever, yet there are machines to fuel and animals to feed. Shockingly, tractors and harvesters are eroding in the middle of a field too.
Vacation? What Vacation?
There will be no vacations. The only holidays are the couple of hours you spend watching TV on the weekend. Other than that, it’s work, work, and, wait for it, more work. Creating a self-sustaining farm takes continuous effort, so you can’t stop for one minute. Plus, there are plenty of features and one of them is bound to break down. When you think you’re safe, a fence breaks and the sheep are loose. Get the dog because it’s time to herd.